It is a truism to say that everyone faces battles in life. At times, we stay silent. Sometimes, we open up. This time, my heart goes to the latter. I would prefer to put my feelings into words because I just can’t help. I hope I would not cry as much as it would.
As a few of you might know, I was unemployed and in a depressive state last year. My experience affected me so strongly that I doubted my potential and questioned my existence. The worst thing that ever happened to me is when I woke up each morning and shed tears. When my mother called me, I wiped my face as though nothing happened. My sleeping and eating patterns rapidly changed and I went out of our house less often. I was not okay, but I showed a different face in front of my family. I shared some varnished truth with them because I hate someone putting himself/herself in my shoe most especially if that someone is the person I love. I just don’t want him/her to feel what I felt. Thankfully, my coping mechanism withstood that obstacle. I diverted my attention to something. Something I used to love. I drew a lot. I read a lot. I wrote a lot. I busied myself with a myriad of diversions. Enough to let myself slowly forget what I was feeling. I thought that was the greatest challenge I had ever encountered.
On December 16 of this year, we were hit by a typhoon. I was away from my family because I worked in spite of the weather condition. There was no suspension of work in our company because of the need for service to our clients. The night when typhoon Rai (Odette) made its landfall gave me a traumatic experience. It ravaged my hometown, other areas in Cebu, and other provinces in the Philippines. I was petrified because I did not receive any replies from my family. And it was my first time not being around with them. After my three-day stay, I opted to go home. What caught my attention when I arrived home is our house at a slant with a few roofs blown away. My whole world was turned upside down while looking at it owing to the fact that we are not well-fixed. Nevertheless, I was thankful because no lives were lost. We have nothing to do, but to deal with its aftermath. At this time, my family is living in a hut adjacent to our house.
We are all in the same boat, so to speak. However, the severity of difficult circumstances makes us different from each other. Needless to say, we don’t own all the problems in the world. We are not alone. There are those who have suffered worse than us. There are those whose pain is more unbearable than ours. But what I dislike the most is both afflictions happened in the same month of different years. It is always in December. A time when everyone is supposed to feel joy and bring it to each other’s hearts. A season when all better celebrate life than live it. A moment when good tidings prevail over the bad ones. In spite of the situation, I declare that those in darkness will see light at the end of the tunnel. I declare that everyone will rise and win after faltering and losing. I declare that the tears will be replaced by smiles one day. I declare that the waves of time will soon be calmer. I declare!